RUN.EAT.GOSSIP

Monday, July 30, 2007

Olympic Gold??

The Olympic Council is trying to prevent Oscar Pistorius from trying out for the Olympics Games. According to Olympic officials, Pistorius who runs with a pair of carbon fibre leg because he doesn’t have real legs has an unfair advantage over normal runners. Firstly, his special shoes – gives him a technological advantage over normal runners as they are lighter and ‘springier’. Further according to the official, since he doesn’t have any legs, he will not have lactic acid buildup; will not suffer leg cramp; will not have associated leg injuries problems like runner knees, shin splint blah blah blah and therefore will not feel fatigue and therefore have unfair edge over mortal human runners.

Hmm, if this is indeed the case and if all it takes is a technologically superior piece of equipment to win............

It is no secret that Singapore wants an Olympic gold medal desperately. Singapore has never been able to produce an Olympic Gold Medalist (for that matter, any medalist except Mr Tan Howe Liang) in any events in the Olympic Games.

The perfect solution is now staring us in the face.

- Despite what the Olympics people said – we need talented runners. People with natural born talent. So first thing first is to scout China and maybe Africa for talents and bring them here under the Foreign Talents scheme.
- Train them to run the 400m and above distance as the fake legs are no good for short distance running as it makes it difficult for him to get off the starting block fast.
- Next, cut off their legs and fit them with the prosthetics legs.
- Viola – natural born talents with technology advantage!

Sure to win the next Olympic gold medal. SSC, SAA and Mr LLK – what say you?

PS: I am sure the runners will have no problems losing a leg or two. After all the reward for winning an Olympic or Asian Games gold is a cool million dollar. Catch them young enough and they have many years to earn this many times over and who knows by than technology will be so advanced that the legs will look and feel like real legs.

2 comments:

  1. Haha... this is absolutely hilarious :D Then again, if we really want that medal so badly... hmmmm :P

    ReplyDelete

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