Broken Vows

I swear many times that I will not run a full marathon again. Not because I think I cannot do it but because I am too lazy to train for it. Then in a stupid moment of bravado, I went and signed up for a 50km trail race. And after countless hours and hours of training, I failed to finish the trail race. Which should tell me to be smart and stay off long distance running. But hell no...

I have a full marathon coming up next year. I don't know whether to celebrate or cry. Celebrate because this is the Tokyo Marathon, one of the major marathon in the year and which everybody tell me is a must do. Unlike the Boston or New York marathon, there is no qualifying time but a lucky draw. And just for a lark, the sidekick and I went to apply and I got in! But not the poor sidekick who was more interested in it than me. So I should be celebrating right?

But I think of the long runs that I going to have to do and I am so depressed that I want to cry. I remembered how it was when the sidekick was training for the Sundown Marathon this year and I was accompanying her. I suffered through most of it and had the ignominy of dropping out less than half way into one of the long runs and taking a bus ride home. And now I got to do it all over again! Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!

But running changes people and is like a mind monster. I haven't even start training for the Tokyo Marathon and I know I gonna hate the training but I am thinking of doing an ultra trail race. Yes it going to suck big time - the training - but I can't get the DNF at the TMBT out of my mind and I think I will have to break my vow and ............